Can I be your memory

I hear alot of God recently. How it has changed them. How God made them realise that they should treasure their loved ones. How happy they are now. How happy their families are now. How God made them good. How God has helped them to be happy. How he is there whenever they need him. How He gives them strength. Quote from a girl, 'I know that whenever i need his strength, i just call out his name or say a small prayer and everything will be ok.'

What I am goin to say below may cause some strong reactions but i must clarify that i have no intentions of being disrepectful as you can see i am addressin God and He with capital letters. So please do not be offended.

So from what i gather is that those people and the ones around them werent happy before God. That they are non appreciative, non thankful, non daring, confused between good or bad (according to the general society's definition).. the list goes on. It is a long list but not every single one applies to everyone, for most only one or some from the list is(are) relevant, but for a few others the entire list is pertinent.

I never do understand why would one need a priest or a bible to tell them what they should or should not do in life. I thought those were very obvious. Be nice to people. Treat them how you want to be treated. Appreciate the good things in life. Do not inflict pain. Be thankful.... But somehow God can be associated to all of them.

Maybe people need to know that there is someone out there who is watchin over them, keeping track of all the good and bad deeds they do, putting pressure over them. For there is the dreaded Judgement Day or for the chinese, the 18 levels of hell. If those punishments aren't present, if goin to church every Sunday doesn mean that you will go to heaven, i wonder if all the worshippers will remain just as faithful.

Have you ever felt like you are happy but not exactly happy? That there are things to be happy about but you can be happier?

The entire phrase on the top of the blog is suppose to go like this.

Flatter me, and I may not believe you. Criticize me, and I may not like you. Ignore me, and I may not forgive you. Encourage me, and I will not forget you. Love me and I may be forced to love you.

I left the last line out.

I believe that feelings can grow. People can be moved by actions and words. I certainly have. It is a great feeling. But feelings can fade too. You had the courage to tell the truth and let me go. And i respect that. I am filled with grief but I will be fine.

I am not blamin you nor am i angry but I cannot bring myself to give you well wishes. Maybe someday.

Someone said, 'I don't feel like I need to seek a man. I will be found.' First thought of mine was so few would have thought it that way. Second thought how naive of her. Soon you will learn and join the rest of us.

It seems to me that everyone is on the great hunt for that soul mate; that love in songs, books and movies; the one who understands you and will be there for you no matter what. The great hunt. How can you believe it when someone says that he has feelings for you? Is that the truth? Is that an influation? Will it fade with time? How do i know? Is there even such a thing? Or its just your hormones playin tricks on you?

So you say, 'what the hack, why not give it a try?' And there comes datin and then you tell yourself not to fall too deep. Not to fall in love. But one day you wake up in the morning and realise that you are in love. At that moment, blinded by hormones you believe in blissfulness. You both truely believe in that. Then what happens. The responsibilty, the give and take, the new habits to get accustomed to, the fights, oh the strain on that blissfulness. Do you work it out or just get a 'new one' to start over?

I like the chase. Who doesn't? But how come every single time when i believed in something and let you take my hand, i dont see you walkin beside me? Instead you end up running in the opposite direction. Is it so difficult to take this walk with me? You are not alone; I was there all along. I am still here.

Life is a game of whist. From unseen sources The cards are shuffled, and the hands are dealt. I do not like the way the cards are shuffled, But yet I like the game and want to play.

Eugene F. Ware